A Dream
by nogin25
Summary: A story of Lou and Jimmy discovering their love for each other and making the hard decisions about what it all means


_**First let me tell you when the story would be taking place. It would have happened between "Survivors" and "Initiation". I have always thought that they did not delve deep enough into Jimmy and Lou's relationship so that is what I do here hope you enjoy:**_

The riders were working on unloading supplies and cleaning. Noah and Kid were unloading grain from the wagon outside, as Jimmy and Lou were mucking out stalls, Buck sat quietly in the corner working on cleaning his saddle, and Cody were brushing out horses. They were harassing Cody about the woman he had seen in town that day. Teaspoon walked in with a group of men and called "Boys"

All of the riders stopped working to see what was going on. "Oh no, not again" exclaimed Cody.

Noah threw the bag of feed he was carrying onto the pile and replied "He definitely has that look doesn't he?"

"Yeah he does, I wonder which of us gets to be deputy this time" Kid said laughingly as he came into the barn.

"I am not drawing the short straw this time, if I do I am going to shoot the rest so they're all short" Jimmy said leaning heavily onto his pitch fork.

"Now wait just one gosh darn minute here, don't I get a chance to explain myself before you all start accusing me?" Teaspoon pointed the men following him to where the riders were working. "If you gentleman will just take over here we will get out of your way."

The riders exchanged puzzled looks as they started to follow Teaspoon out of the barn. Lou handed her pitch fork to a man and asked "What's going on Teaspoon?"

"Not yet" Teaspoon said with a meaningful glance at the men that had started working in the barn. They went into the bunk house and settled in around the table. Teaspoon closed the door firmly behind him and turned to the riders. "Boys, Lou," he gave Lou a top of the hat "I just had a talk with the Governor's man and he has a job for us."

"I hope it is an easy one that pays well" Cody whispered to Buck. All the riders laughed and shook their heads.

"Cody you know we ain't supposed to be drinking while we work for Majors" laughed Kid.

"Very funny, now settle down and I will tell you what he wants. A man carrying letters to four forts in the area was killed at the beginning of the week. The governor now wants us to be the ones to deliver the messages."

As Teaspoon talked the riders straightened up and gave him their undivided attention. "Do we know what the letters are for, or are we just going to risk our lives to deliver them" Buck asked?

"Well actually there is going to be two sets of letters and yes we know what is in both sort of. The first set to be delivered by Noah and Cody will be a warning that there is a rogue Arapaho raiding group riding around the territory burning down homesteads. The second will carried by Jimmy and Lou. This one is what the man was trying to deliver last week. It has to do with the coming war. These forts have men that want to destabilize the area so we aren't strong when the war breaks out. The letters will contain a list of the men. The catch is that they are time sensitive so we have to have them delivered in two weeks. There are actually two envelopes in each one telling the captains not to open them until Saturday of the second week so that no one can get out to warn the other conspirators. This is why we have to get them there before then."

"Why two sets of people, can't just one deliver both messages" asked Cody looking around the room for support.

Teaspoon started to answer but Noah interrupted him "Well that's easy he is sending the best shot and the fastest rider with the important messages. Which makes you and me bait" he said pointing between him and Cody. "Isn't that right Teaspoon?"

"I might not have put it that way" replied Teaspoon looking a little uncomfortable "but yeah that is the basic point of it. You two will ride a head taking the most direct route possible while Lou and Jimmy will go back ways."

"Send me instead I am just as fast and a better shot than Lou" Kid interrupted looking upset and a little scared.

"Now wait just one minute Kid I can take care of myself. I don't need you taking my jobs." Lou half rose from the table scowling as she spook.

Teaspoon put a hand on her shoulder easing her back down onto the bench while saying. "I can't send you instead of her because she looks better in a dress than you do." That got everyone's attention again and wiped Lou's glare from her face. "The governor felt that the second party should have a fake story as to why they were traveling to the forts. Otherwise the traitors would probably pick up on them quicker. So Jimmy and Lou, or should I say Rose, I know pronounce you husband and wife."

"What are you talking about Teaspoon" Jimmy exclaimed flashing back to a night a couple months ago by a fire. He, Kid, and Lou had been taking an outlaw, Elias Mills to be hung. Kid had been shot and Lou and Jimmy were alone when he had kissed her. Nothing had happened since then and he kept telling himself he didn't want anything else to happen. He looked desperately from Lou to Kid and back to Teaspoon.

"You two are going to travel as husband and wife."

"What if someone recognizes me Teaspoon" Lou looked worried and started chewing at her nail.

"If they do just say you're your cousin that would explain the resemblance and also how Jimmy met you" Teaspoon said with a shrug.

Lou thought this over and gave a small nod thinking that it was crazy but it just might work. She had found that most people saw and believed what they wanted to. "I won't ride in skirts Teaspoon they get in the way and I can't wear my gun with them on, and I have a feeling I am going to need it."

"I figured you would say that so I sent Rachel to get you more feminine clothes to wear."

"Send me in Jimmy's place than" Kid interrupted again. He glared angrily at Jimmy he still suspected that he was secretly after Lou.

"That won't work either Kid because I don't think you would be able to follow the next order." Teaspoon stopped talking and took a deep breath before continuing on "If one of you is captured the other will have to leave them behind."

"What" cried Kid and Jimmy together while Lou just stared at the table.

"These messages have to get through not just because of the war but because those forts help with Indians and outlaws. We need them to be stable and ready for battle. So the rider the letters has to get through. Which brings me to you and Bucks jobs" he said staring at Kid. "Buck you will have to ride out now to the Oto Jimmy and Lou will be riding through their hunting grounds and I don't want them to attack. We have a treaty with them so there shouldn't be a problem, but I would rather you talk to them so they know they are coming. Soaring Eagle and I go way back which may be more helpful than a treaty. After you talk to him go to Fort Calhoun and wait for both parties. Kid you are ride to Fort Kearney and do the same. If anything happens to Jimmy or Lou you will take their place and forget about the back ways and just run for it. God willing they make it there safe move onto the next Fort in the line.

"Cody, Noah you don't need to leave anyone behind fight like hell and ride as hard as you can. You and your horses can rest at the fort while you wait for Lou and Jimmy to catch up. They will give you their envelope and you can deliver both messages to the Colonels.

"Boys this isn't through the company if any of you don't want to do it I'll understand" he looked long and hard at each one of them.

"Have we ever let you down" asked Cody?

"You better not let him answer that Cody we probably don't have time for that list" Noah joked as he gave Cody a gentle shove as they all stood.

Teaspoon just shook his head and turned to Buck "Get packed you need to head out now if you are going to make it to Fort Calhoun before they get there." Buck nodded and started to pack his stuff. "Kid you will be leaving too so get packed."

"I'll go saddle their horses" Lou volunteered as she stood from the table.

"No the others will do that you pack up and head over to Rachel's she should be back with your new stuff." Lou nodded and as she headed towards her trunk Teaspoon called to her "Oh and Lou take a dress so while you are at the forts you look more like Rose and less like Lou."

As Teaspoon gave Buck a few last minute instructions he climbed up on the saddle. Buck turned his horse to leave when he spotted Lou coming out of Rachel's place. He stopped and stared at her. He knew she was a girl but she was still one of the guys to him and it startled him every time he saw her dressed as a girl. Rachel had braded her hair to keep it out of her face for the trip and she had changed into her new clothes. She now wore a pair of dark blue paints and a fitted white top with a swooped neck showing more skin than the boys were used to seeing. As she walked down the steps she pulled on a fitted matching dark blue vest that fit her like a glove.

Buck called out to Jimmy who was with the others loading their saddle bags and bed rolls onto their horses. "Jimmy are you sure you don't want to switch with me?"

The others turned to see what he was talking about and stopped in their tracks just staring at Lou. Turning red she self consciously put a hand to her chest covering the exposed skin. After all of these years dressing as a boy she was not used to wearing such tight fitting clothes. To make matters worse the looks the boys were all giving her was anything but brotherly.

Cody leaned on his horse enjoying the view and added "If that is what the short straw gets you I'll take it next time."

Rachel came out and wrapped an arm around Lou's shoulders hugging her gently "Don't you boys have something better to do than stare?"

"No not really" Cody replied while leaning more heavily onto his horse. Jimmy slapped the horse on the butt making it jump forward and causing Cody to fall sideways. Everyone laughed as Kid helped Cody up they all went back to what they were doing. Before Jimmy turned back to his horse he gave Lou a small node, and she smiled appreciatively at him.

Teaspoon gave Buck's horse a tap on the side to get him on his way and called "Ride safe" as Buck started his trip to the Oto tribe. Teaspoon turned back to the rest of them and asked "Kid you ready, you should be going soon too?"

"Almost I just have to grab something from the bunk house." He walked by Lou and whispered "You look beautiful". He gently brushed the back of her hand with his fingers and continued on to the bunk house. She started to blush again and walked over to the horses rubbing the spot where he touched her.

"I grabbed your bed roll" Jimmy told her as she approached "I just have to get my pack and then I will be ready." Jimmy walked away as Lou started to double check all the straps on her saddle.

Jimmy ran up the steps into the bunk house and was startled when he came face to face with an angry looking Kid. "What the.." he exclaimed

Kid did not give him a chance to finish before he started in on him. "You had better not listen to Teaspoon. If you leave her behind and she gets hurt. I'll…"

"You'll what kill me. Get in line Kid there are a whole bunch of people that already want to do that."

"Jimmy, you should have told her to stay here or switch with me."

"Because telling Lou what to do always worked out so well for you" Jimmy asked as he pushed by Kid?

"This is too dangerous she can get herself killed."

"She can get herself killed walking down the street Kid. She loves her job and she is going to keep doing it no matter what you or I say. You need to get used to that." Jimmy shoved his tooth kit into his saddle bag and turned back to Kid. "This was the problem when you two were together. You kept trying to protect her and make her into something she isn't"

"So what I should be like you and let her run off and get herself killed" Kid crossed his arms defensively and glared back at Jimmy.

"She belongs with us Kid not left behind. She has more than proved that she as good in a fight as any of us. Besides she would go nuts here and just find a way to get into more trouble." Jimmy started to leave when Kid grabbed his arm.

Kid said "I just want to protect her can't you see that" with a little desperation in his eyes. "I don't know what I would do if something happened to her."

Jimmy pulled away and turned back to Kid. In a more gentle voice he replied "You need to stop trying to protect her and instead start fighting alongside her. It is not in her to stand by when people she loves are in danger. Just like we wouldn't either. What do you think it would do to her if something were to happen to any of us and she was here doing nothing." He turned back to the door and came to a stop again. This time it was because Lou was stand in the door. She had a look torn between anger and love. Jimmy was not sure he wanted to be there when she decided which emotion to go with. So he slide by her leaving the Kid and her alone to talk.

As he walked away he heard her say. "I needed to get my gun."

Kid stood staring at Lou as she put her gun belt. She was trying hard to pretend he was not in the room. Every time she thought she might be able to get over him he pulled a stunt like this. It was a double edged blade. It reminded her just how much he cared, and yet also showed that he really did not get her sometimes. She glanced out the door at Jimmy's retreating back and almost smiled. Jimmy understood her so much better than Kid. He knew that what she really needed was someone to be there for her not to always hide her.

Kid cleared his throat and Lou gave a little start and looked back at him. "I'm sorry Lou but I..."  
"You made you point clear Kid. I can even understand it, but it won't change my mind. Teaspoon is waiting on you. You better leave."

He looked at her as if there were a hundred things he wanted to tell but in the end he just shook his head and walked out. Lou went to the door and watched as he mounted up and talked to Teaspoon one last time. He looked back at her and she wished she could tell him all the things in her heart but knew that it would do no good. She turned back into the bunk house so she wouldn't have to see him leave and to wipe the tears away.

After she was sure Kid was gone and that she wouldn't cry she went back outside with her saddle bag.

"You four can ride out together and split at the y in the road about 20 miles out. Lou keep your hat pulled down so no one around here recognizes you" Teaspoon said with a little wink at Lou. "Wouldn't want the town knowing you're a girl I might have to fire you then." They all gave a nervous laugh. "Well head on out and be careful, I am getting to old to train new riders to replace you." The two sets of riders kicked their horses into a gallop as Teaspoon stood back and watched.

The group pulled their horses to a stop at the y in the road. All of them had stripped their coats off as they had road. It was still fairly warm out for October, but they would need them later because the nights were getting very cold. "What do you say time for lunch or do we all eat in the saddle" Cody asked?

"Better not this is going to be a long ride and we only have 2 weeks to do it in" Jimmy said wiping his forehead with a bandana.

"Well then see you two in a couple days. Try to stay alive I hate pulling double duty" Noah sighed leaning on his saddle horn.

Jimmy tucked the handkerchief in his pockets and said "Thanks for the concern. Besides Lou and I will be honeymooning out in the wild while you are chased by the bad guys."

"Thanks for the reminder" Cody called over his shoulder as he and Noah rode away.

On their second night out Jimmy stopped Lou and said "This would be a good place to stay the night. The stream is just a little ways off maybe we could catch a fish or two for dinner."

Lou eased back into her saddle as she rubbed her lower back. "You sure we could make Kearney tonight if we push a little further."

"Nah, we are both tired, we made good time, and the horses could use a rest. No point in pushing them if we don't have to."

Lou complained as she climbed out of the saddle "Yeah but there would be beds and baths in Kearney."

Jimmy laughed as he started to take his saddle off his horse and rub him down. "We also could use a night to talk about what we avoided last night."

"You mean how we are going to pull off being married, hell madly in love on a whirlwind marriage?"

He nodded, but didn't say anything. He kept his back to her and continued to brush out his horse. Lou could see the tension in his shoulders. She put her saddle bag and bed roll down and walked over to him. He could hear her coming up behind him but did not turn around to face her. She gently reached up and touched his shoulder. Jimmy reached over and took her hand in his and pulled her in front of him. He had not stopped thinking about that kiss and the possibilities. He tried hard not to but at moments like this it all came back to him.

Lou interrupted his thoughts "Also about leaving someone behind if necessary." This startled Jimmy so much that he dropped her hand and stepped back. "Look why don't I finish setting up camp and you can go catch us some dinner." She patted him on the shoulder as she went back to work. "Oh and while you cook dinner up I will take a dip in the creek." She laughed and picked up her stuff.

The fish and beans were cooking as Jimmy stared into the fire trying hard not to think about what the splashing he heard meant. He turned the fish which was almost done cooking "If you want a hot dinner you might want to get out and get dressed."

Lou said "Done it was too cold to stay in long . It just felt good" as she walked back into the clearing re-braiding her hair. "I will stand watch if you want to take a bath too. I can protect from all of the wild animals."

Jimmy laughed as he handed her a plate of food "How about you wash the dishes instead. I heard you scream as you jumped in."

Lou sat down by the fire mumbling "I didn't scream, maybe a little gasp but no screaming."

After dinner they settled into their bed rolls on opposite sides of the fire. "Jimmy?"

He rolled over to face her and said "Hmm?"

"If something happens will you promise to leave me if you have to?" He started to roll back over. "Wait I am being serious. Look I don't want to be left but Teaspoon is right if the forts fall we may as move on now because the towns will be killed off one by one." Jimmy laid staring up at the stars without saying anything. "Did you mean what you told kid?"

He looked back at her scowling "That is low Lou."

"You didn't answer the question." Jimmy didn't reply, but instead just jerked his head in what could have been a nod so Lou pushed on "I know it is a lot to ask, and hopefully it won't come to that." She took a deep breath and continued on "I just don't want to be the reason we don't complete the job."

Jimmy finally turned back to her "Do you know what you are asking me?"

"Yeah to go get help and come back for me, just like I would do if you get caught."

Jimmy grudgingly laughed "Yeah, alright I promise, but if Kid kills me it is on your head."

This sobered up Lou which was not what Jimmy had been hoping for. He wished he could take it back but it was too late. "Yeah about him" she said rolling onto her back. "I don't think he will ever change the way he treats me." Jimmy just stared at her not knowing what to say. "Maybe it is time I stopped waiting for him to realize I am my own person." She rolled back over and met Jimmy's eyes. "I have been thinking about something Elias told me about you." Jimmy arched his eyebrow in an unspoken question. "He said that I was woman enough to match you. I have been wondering if I need someone man enough to match me."

They were quiet for a long time just staring at each other. Jimmy wishing she hadn't said that. It was his dream and nightmare coming true. "Lou I don't think I…. I mean every time someone gets close to me they get hurt. Hell you have been kidnapped because of me. If it were" he stopped taking a deep breath. "If it were my fault, I would go down the road I have been headed on without a chance to come back." He waited for Lou to say something when she didn't he continued on. "Plus what about Kid?"

"He has tried to move on so maybe it is my turn to try to find happiness." She broke eye contact with him and pulled her blanket up to her chin. "I don't know maybe I shouldn't have said anything."

"No it's ok I have thought about it too." A thought came to him making him hesitate. He finally decided to just come out and say it. "Look we have a week or so alone maybe we should just see how it goes."

Lou didn't say anything so Jimmy rolled over thinking he had gone too far. He heard Lou rustling around behind him but didn't turn around to see what she was doing. When something hit the ground behind him he jumped and rolled around. Lou was standing over him. He looked to see what she had thrown down and saw her bed roll. She slowly laid down with her back to him. She rested her head on his arm. Jimmy laid there stiff for a moment. He had been with other woman but not like this. He relaxed after a minute. He pulled her blanket up covering her and wrapped his arm around her waist. She relaxed into his embrace.

Jimmy whispered into her hair "This is probably a really bad idea."

"Just promise me no matter what either of us decides that we will stay friends."

Jimmy kissed her gently on the top of her head and pulled her closer to him tucking her head under his chin. "You won't be able to get rid of me that easily."


End file.
